At eight months old, Kiara and Abbigail Herbst are already showing very different personalities.
Abbigail is the outgoing one. She laughs whenever she sees a face, keeps busy from morning to night and treats almost everything around her as a jungle gym. She wants to be part of every bit of action.
Kiara, her smaller sister, is more reserved. She is calm, friendly and quick to smile, with thoughtful eyes that seem to take in everything around her.
For their mother, former Mrs South Africa and Mrs World Tereza Troskie-Herbst, the twins are far more than a new addition to the family. They represent the fulfilment of years of prayers after painful loss, disappointment and uncertainty.
Abbigail and Kiara were Tereza and her husband, Bennie Herbst’s, last chance of becoming parents again after more than a decade of hope and heartache.
“Bennie and I had long conversations before we decided to try surrogacy one last time,” Tereza (57) says after welcoming us into her Bloemfontein home.
It was not an easy decision. The couple knew they could face another devastating outcome, but they also could not ignore the possibility that this time might be different.
In 2016, their son Jayden Ben died at just six days old after his heart suddenly stopped. Jayden had been born via a surrogate. In the years that followed, another surrogate pregnancy ended in miscarriage.
The couple was frightened to try again and worried about opening themselves up to more heartbreak. But one question refused to go away: what if it worked this time?
“I think you can be very grateful for the family you already have and still feel there’s room for another child,” Tereza says.
Tereza is also the mother of Jamie, 28, her son with film magnate Boet Troskie. Boet, the producer behind films such as The Gods Must Be Crazy, died in 2022 at the age of 86.
Tereza and Boet split in 2002. Bennie, 46, later became a father figure to Jamie.
“Their bond shows a father-child relationship is built through love, care and commitment.”
Early last year, a woman whose identity Tereza and Bennie wish to keep private contacted them unexpectedly and offered to carry a baby for them.
“We were floored,” Tereza says.
“We kept asking, ‘But why would you do this for us?’ Her answer was simple: ‘Because you deserve to have a baby’.”
The couple decided to protect themselves emotionally and not build expectations around the pregnancy. They agreed that if the woman fell pregnant, they would leave matters in her hands and take each day as it came.
“We decided to protect our hearts and have no expectations. If she became pregnant, we said we’d leave things in her hands and just step back.
“The only condition Bennie and I had was that we’d choose the doctors – we wanted assurance that the best team would be there if something went wrong.”
They also decided not to tell Jamie about the offer until they knew the surrogate was pregnant. Once the pregnancy was confirmed and progressing well, they shared the news with him.
Jamie was happy for them, but Tereza says he was also protective because he knew what they had already endured.
“I’m proud of the man he’s become and the way he loves his own family and supports us. Being his mom is still one of the greatest privileges of my life.”
Then came another surprise. During one of the first examinations, the scan showed that the couple was not expecting one baby girl, but two.
“It felt like a miracle,” Tereza says.
“But I must admit, it was also quite overwhelming.
“Bennie and I looked at the screen and then at each other and initially we didn’t know what to say. After everything we’d already been through, the knowledge we were having two babies was almost too big to comprehend.
“Bennie gave me this look like he wanted to ask, ‘How are we going to manage this?’ And yes, running away flashed through my mind for a moment!
“But beneath all the shock there was finally just deep gratitude.”
The pregnancy was not always smooth. The surrogate was admitted to hospital several times for observation, and the couple remained cautious as they waited for the babies to grow.
For a long time, they called the unborn girls Baby 1 and Baby 2 because giving them names would make the pregnancy feel more real.
“We called the twins Baby 1 and Baby 2 for a very long time,” she says.
“We felt the moment we named them it would become more real.”
Bennie only began preparing the baby room when the surrogate was 25 weeks pregnant. That was also when the couple started buying two of everything and seriously discussing names.
They eventually chose Kiara, which means “the Lord is my light and my salvation”, and Abbigail, which means “the joy of the Lord is your strength”.
Tereza says Bennie remained steady throughout the process, even when fear returned.
“He understood that true strength doesn’t mean you’re never scared – it means that despite the fear you keep believing and keep moving forward. When I was worried, he was my anchor. When the road became uncertain, he carried me.”
Everything appeared to be going according to plan until 33 weeks.
On 18 February, Tereza and Bennie accompanied the surrogate to a routine check-up. The doctor told them something was wrong and that the babies had to be delivered. The surrogate’s blood pressure was dangerously high and the amniotic fluid around the babies was dangerously low.
She needed an emergency caesarean section.
The surrogate was admitted to hospital about an hour later and given steroids to help strengthen the babies’ lungs. The operation was scheduled for early the following morning.
At 33 weeks, the twins were born prematurely. Babies born before 37 completed weeks are regarded as preterm, and those born between 32 and 37 weeks fall into the moderate-to-late preterm category. High blood pressure disorders in pregnancy are among the serious complications doctors monitor closely because they can threaten both mother and baby.
When Tereza and Bennie entered the operating theatre and saw the specialist team waiting, they understood that the birth could still bring danger.
“You could cut the tension in the theatre with a knife,” Tereza recalls.
“All the nursing staff knew we’d lost Jayden 10 years before, so there was a silent understanding of how much this moment meant to us. It felt like everyone was holding their breath while we waited to hear the first little cries.”
Kiara weighed 1,7kg and Abbigail weighed 1,9kg. Tereza was terrified, but hearing their first cries brought enormous relief.
The relief did not last long. The twins were taken straight to the neonatal intensive care unit, where premature and vulnerable babies receive close medical attention.
“But that relief quickly made way for new tension when they had to go to the NICU straight away. They were so small and so fragile. Bennie was first out of theatre with Abbigail and I followed with Kiara. There were tubes and wires all over their little bodies.”
The girls remained in the unit for four weeks while they grew stronger. Tereza and Bennie visited the hospital every day and learned to focus on small improvements rather than becoming overwhelmed by every change on the monitors.
“Every hour, every small improvement, meant so much. We went for the small wins, learnt how to watch numbers on the monitors, but also not to be overwhelmed by every change.”
Before long, the couple was able to hold and feed their daughters.
“It felt surreal to hold them in my arms for the first time. After so many years of trying and waiting, it was strange to realise they were actually here now.
“I had to give myself a moment to take in that they’re the two little girls we waited so long for.”
While the twins were still in hospital, Tereza faced another challenge. She had a scheduled hip replacement and was admitted a week after the girls were born.
“I was admitted a week after the girls were born. I sat next to their cribs with my crutches on the same day I was operated on. Poor Bennie really had to run around between the three of us and make sure he got to see each of us.
“Two weeks after my operation I started getting around with one crutch, and six weeks later I was walking normally again and starting to go to gym.”
Jamie and his partner, Nicola Steyn, visited soon after the twins were born. They were only allowed to see the babies after two weeks, and when they finally did, they were too nervous to hold them because they were so tiny.
“And then they were too scared to hold the babies because they were so tiny,” Tereza says. “They were smaller than Jamie’s hands.”
In March, after four weeks in hospital, the twins were finally strong enough to go home.
“It felt surreal that we didn’t have to go home without them again,” Tereza recalls.
“That first night after we brought them here, Bennie and I were too tired to say anything to each other.
“The long road of surrogacy, uncertainty and losses had finally come to an end and we could close the book on the surrogacy journey.”
The couple still struggled with fear in the first few weeks at home. Memories of Jayden’s death returned, and they often woke during the night to check that the babies were breathing.
Things have become easier, but the twins still sleep in their parents’ room so Tereza and Bennie can keep an eye on them.
“That way we can keep an eye on them all the time and it gives us peace of mind.
“The past eight months have been incredible, exhausting, intense and special.
“Every smile and new milestone makes all the tiredness worthwhile – Kiara and Abbigail have made our lives and hearts fuller than we could ever imagine.
“After so many years, my days are revolving around bottles, nappies and bedtime again, but I’m enjoying it so much.”
Tereza says Bennie has embraced fatherhood and plays an active role in caring for the girls.
“He goes to them when they wake at night, makes bottles, feeds them. The twins are crazy about him – they start laughing when they hear his voice and throw their little hands in the air for him to pick them up.”
The twins have also brought a new relationship into focus. Tereza became a grandmother a year ago when Jamie and Nicola welcomed their son, Jean-Luc.
“And he’s Granny’s treasure,” Tereza says.
Although Jamie and Nicola live in Cape Town, while Bennie runs a business managing medical agencies in the Free State and Northern Cape, the families stay connected through regular video calls.
Tereza, who was crowned Mrs SA in 2000 and Mrs World the following year, says she and Nicola often exchange advice about raising babies.
“Nicola is a modern young mom. If I want to know something, I ask her – I don’t have to pretend I have all the answers because I’m older.
“We’re both moms with young children now and that shared experience makes our bond stronger.”
Tereza says it is especially meaningful to watch Jamie build a relationship with his baby sisters.
“But we make video calls often,” Tereza says. “Jamie wants to see his sisters and I want to see my grandson. It’s so special to see how much my son loves his two little sisters and how proud he is to be their big brother.”
For now, Tereza’s attention is firmly on Kiara and Abbigail. She has put work matters, including her involvement with beauty competitions, on hold and takes the babies with her wherever she goes.
Being a mother again at 57 has been demanding, but Tereza says she remains committed to protecting her health and peace.
“I’ve always believed a healthy body houses a healthy spirit. That’s why I exercise every day of the week, I eat healthily and look after myself emotionally.
I’ve learnt you must protect your peace.”
The girls now fill the family’s days with bottles, nappies, bedtime routines, laughter and new milestones. Their arrival has not erased the pain of losing Jayden, but it has given Tereza and Bennie a future they once feared they might never have.
“The babies go everywhere with me and they love it, especially riding in the car. Kiara and Abbigail are testimony that giving up isn’t an option. They remind me of every setback we had to process before we got here.
“They don’t undo the pain of the past, but they show that our story didn’t end there. That’s why I want to say to other couples out there, don’t give up hope.
“Because after the storms comes the light.”